Whodunnit? Eyewire exclusive on Grim’s mysterious disappearance!
Extra, extra, read all about it! Grim’s shocking disappearance from the land of Eyewire!
Just as Eyewirers are gearing up for this month’s competition, we’ve learned that Grim is nowhere to be found! Rumors are circulating as to what could have happened to the mysterious omniscient presence in the Eyewire community.
Rumors have begun to circulate around his unprecedented exit. Some expect foul play is afoot! But Grim is a beloved staple of the Eyewire community! Who would have wanted to see him go? The National Enqeyewirer is on the case! Read up on our list of suspects thus far.
Hailing from a long lineage of Alaskan lumberjacks, rprentki spent her childhood wrestling polar bears on the Alaskan tundra. An expert furniture maker and upholsterer, rprentki’s built and furnished her own log cabin where she resides in the Alaskan wilderness. She also builds neurons with the same care and precision that she dedicates to her tables and chairs. No one would suspect rprentki of doing anything to jeopardize Eyewire…. But one never knows. Perhaps the fumes from the furniture polish have finally set her over the edge.
Devonjones is an international rising star on the underground metal scene, playing shows to sold out crowds from everywhere from Boston to Helsinki. Practiced linguist, devonjones writes songs lyrics in many of the languages in which he is fluent, which, along with his insane stage antics, has helped him gain popularity with an international audience. Eyewire players say devonjones is a friendly and helpful admin, could he have really had anything to do with Grim’s disappearance? However, recent rumors suggest that Jones’ rising fame has begun to go to his head, and he wants to be “even more metal than death itself.” Could Grim’s disappearance have anything to do with these allegations?
From board games to indie Steam games, to mobile games, to science games and beyond, M has had an affinity for gaming in all forms since her formidable years. Now a renowned pinball champion, sorek.m is notorious for honing her world-class flipping skills at machines around the Boston area. But with some scrappy new competitors on the pinballing scene lately, sorek.m has said she’s been practicing day and night to keep up with the cream of the pinball crop. Pinball games don’t pay for themselves – could Grim’s large inheritance be enticing enough for sorek.m to take drastic measures?
We’ve all heard of the crazy cat lady, but what about the crazy dog lady? A woman of few words, Celia prefers to spend time with her four legged sausage dog companions. Having established the “Home for Wayward Dachshunds,” the world’s best (and only) rehabilitation sanctuary for dachshunds who started down the wrong path Celia is a notorious figure in the hot dog community. But with so many dachshunds in need of loving home, could Grim’s fortune be enough to send Celia over the edge? And after hearing “it’s always the quiet ones” one too many times, has she finally snapped?
World renowned storm chaser, Twister can be seen close by the eye of any hurricane. He’s followed category 5 hurricanes and F-5 tornadoes across the US, reporting his findings from his personal news van called the TwisterMobile. Fearless in the face of death, could Twister have taken out death himself? And whatever happened to Twister1? The world may never know….
Executive director of Eyewire, no one would suspect amy to want Grim, one Eyewire’s best loved players, to disappear. But perhaps her bubbly personality and cheerful enthusiasm for all things Eyewire is really just a facade for something much more sinister. Perhaps amy has been planning Grim’s downfall all along, and we were just too blindsided to see it! Soon we’ll find out!
With an eye for all things design, designdruid always brings the latest and greatest to Eyewire’s appearance. Why would he want to see Grim’s gone? Perhaps it’s because Grim’s profile consistently breaks everyone’s UI, and forces fonts to enlarge to unpleasantly large sizes? Or could it be that he’s just mad that Grim stole his color palette? Whatever the case, he’s definitely one to keep an eye out for.
Super developer sapphiresun has been hacking away at computer code since he was just a wee lad. Now an adult-sized development machine, most people think Will would only want the best for Eyewire. Perhaps during one late night of coding too many, he accidentally mistook Grim for a bug and deleted him from Eyewire’s code? Is his proclaimed innocence just a coverup for his egregious mistake? The National Enqeyewirer is on the case!
The other half of Eyewire’s development team. When his hands aren’t hacking out new code on the keyboard, they’re wrapped around the wheel of a shiny, suped-up racecar. Rumor has it that the latest Fast and the Furious movie is just a thinly veiled biography of Kelv’s life. Could he have put too much pedal to the metal one dark and stormy night, and accidentally collided… right into Grim?
The man who started it all. Eyewire is Sebastian’s baby, and we’d think that he wouldn’t want anything bad to happen to it or any of its members. However, there can only be one supreme master of Eyewire, and perhaps Sebastian thought Grim needed to be taken down a peg or two. One can only speculate….
Stay tuned for more updates from the National Enqeyewirer. We’ve heard a rumor that this month’s competition events will be announced shortly. Find out more soon, only at the National Enqeyewirer.
Artwork by Maddi Coyne
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